In the early days of online relationships, there was a likelihood that anyone you actually met in the flesh would be somewhat relationally-challenged (think Dilbert). Online dating and dating services have become so common that nowadays you're dealing with a wide spectrum of people. In the post 9/11 world, many people have become so concerned about safety that they see threats lurking around every corner. There are just not that many Hannibal Lecters out there. The odds that you've hooked up with one of them are no greater than the chance of being hit by a car while crossing the street and how much do you worry about that?

Still, it only takes one. You are dealing with a near stranger and should take care not to reveal too much personal information until you know them better. The consequences are more likely to be a nuisance rather than catastrophic, but who needs any more nuisance in their life? Giving your cell number to someone who you end up hating will not enhance your life. When you do decide to meet with your online friend, do it in a well-lit, public location (afternoon is better than evening). Be responsible for your own transportation. There's no need to be paranoid, just take sensible precautions. If anything about your date is making you uncomfortable, don't ignore it. While it rarely comes to this, be prepared and able to leave if you find the situation threatening. If you don't have a car, make sure you have enough money with you to take a cab. And be sure to take your cell phone with you.

Take the time to thoroughly familiarize yourself with your partner's profile. An environmentalist is not likely to have a very rewarding date with an oil company employee. The same goes for a vegan and a butcher. One of the great things about online dating services is that they will try to match you with someone whose interests, likes, dislikes and world view are compatible with your own. Take advantage of this. While your service can't do anything about chemistry, it can help in finding those who mirror your inner self — or are complete opposites, if that's what you're looking for.

Also, know what type of relationship you're seeking. You are much more likely to find what you want if it's well-defined. In your initial contact, don't try to do too much at once. People often want to show so much of themselves that it just gushes out and becomes disorganized. Keep it simple at first and let the intimacy build. You'll have plenty to talk about with your new partner, there's no need to do it all at once. Also, make sure to pay attention to what your partner is saying. After all, it takes two to make relationships work.

The moment has finally arrived. You're ready to meet. How should you go about it? The key to success is flexibility. It's probably best to meet in a neutral and non-stressful environment, like a coffee bar. You've both built up an image of each other and the reality is bound to be somewhat different. This isn't necessarily bad, your date may be much better than what you've pictured. Still, the first meeting in the flesh is always something of a shock. It's best to start off with a limited itinerary and see how well you hit it off. Bring a list of potential movies, clubs or events that you might want to take in. You'll both be more at ease if you're at an activity that is mutually enjoyable.

Here's where your online profile and personals relationship comes in handy. You already know something about each other's likes and dislikes; you're unlikely to invite a metal enthusiast to an afternoon at the opera or vice versa. Even if you're both adventurous types who crave novelty, it's still a good idea to start off with a familiar activity, like a movie or a concert. If you're into edgy, there will be lots of time for that once you know each other better. And once again, be aware of your personal safety. Never let your partner pick you up on your first offline date, be sure you're in a well-lit public place and have the means and opportunity of leaving if you feel threatened.

You don't know them. Most problems that people experience when taking an online relationship into the real world come from forgetting this simple fact. Sure, you've seen a profile and maybe a picture, exchanged e-mails and likely had a phone conversation or two. You're still missing all the physical and non-verbal cues that you normally receive from even the most casual of everyday acquaintances. Posture, facial expression and body language do not transmit in e-mails. Neither do olfactory senses, such as odor and pheromones. All you really know is your partner's online persona.

There's nothing sinister or worrisome about this as long as you keep it in mind. Every relationship, from a friendly one to the most torrid love relationship, has to start somewhere. Exchanging multiple e-mails, particularly in a personals relationship, can feel like you can see inside your partner's soul when in reality, you're dealing with nearly a total stranger. While it's true that people can pretty much say anything they want about themselves in their online profile, there's no need to be unduly suspicious of their claims. Suspicion is a poor way to start any kind of relationship. Just be aware that your partner is trying to cast him or herself in the best possible light (just like you probably are).

Individual tastes may vary, but you probably shouldn't wait more than a few weeks after initial contact before setting up a first date. Exchanging several e-mails and a phone call or two should be sufficient to move from virtual reality into the more challenging field of reality itself. Waiting much longer is an indication that a person isn't ready to commit to having a real world relationship. People can sometimes get so caught up in the process of maintaining an online personals relationship that they forget to ask themselves whether they're ready to move on to a dating relationship.

Always know what level of involvement you're ready for. Hopefully, your partner is asking themselves the same question. It is a big move, but unless you joined your online dating service to find a pen-pal, it's a move you'll have to make sooner or later. If there's something about your partner that's making you nervous, communicate that fact to them. If not, it's probably time to take the plunge. It may be helpful at this stage to remind yourself that what you're setting out on is an adventure, not a task. If you can maintain your spirit of adventure, you'll be fine.